Everything you need to know about the NFC and AFC Championship games

KALAHAN DENG

The Super Bowl is so close you can almost SMELL it (but luckily you can’t, because it would smell like man sweat and fryer grease).

This weekend, the four remaining teams in the playoffs will come together in two semifinal games to determine who gets to play for all the marbles in Houston. Here’s everything you need to know to watch, understand and enjoy the games.
First, we’ll look at the NFC game. If you’re interested in the AFC game, just scroll down.

NFC Championship

When will the NFC Championship be played?
Kickoff is at 3:05 p.m. on Sunday, January 22.
Who is playing?
The Atlanta Falcons will be playing the Green Bay Packers.
Where will it be played?
It will be played at the Georgia Dome in Atlanta. Fun fact: This will be the last NFL game in the Georgia Dome, where the Falcons have played since 1992. Next season, they’ll move next door to the new Mercedes-Benz Stadium, which looks like a Transformer disguising itself as a Taco Bell Crunchwrap Supreme.
How can I watch it?
The game will be broadcast on FOX.
Who are the quarterbacks?
Matt Ryan is the quarterback for the Falcons and Aaron Rodgers is the quarterback for the Packers. They both seem like nice young men.
How good are they?
SO GOOD. Rodgers was Super Bowl MVP when the Packers won it in 2011. He also nabbed league MVP in 2011 and 2014. Ryan isn’t quite as decorated, but he’s a favorite for the MVP award this year and has been the top quarterback in the league this season in various metrics. Some might say he is woefully underrated, a vibrant rose of talent nearly in full bloom. That’s just the unbiased opinion here at CNN Digital in…Atlanta…
Who are the coaches?
Mike McCarthy is the head coach of the Packers, and Dan Quinn is the head coach of the Falcons.
What’s the line on the game?
The Falcons are favored to win, but only by about 4 or 5 points, depending on who you ask. It’ll be quite the game.
I have gotten eight questions in and still don’t know what the NFC is.
It stands for “National Football Conference.” There are 32 NFL teams that are divided into two conferences, with the other being the American Football Conference. Within each conference, there are four divisions with four teams each. The winners of those divisions play in the the divisional rounds, then those winners play in the Conference Championship round (this one) and those winners go the Super Bowl, and then THOSE winners go to Disney World. Math!
How many Super Bowls have the Packers won?
Four! Four Super Bowls, including one under Rodgers himself! Ah ah ah!
How many Super Bowls have the Falcons won?
Zero! Zero Sup– okay that’s no fun.
Isn’t Aaron Rodgers the guy in that thing?
If you do not follow football, you may still have seen Aaron Rodgers in one of many State Farm commercials.
Oh, the discount doublecheck guy!
The man himself.
Why isn’t Matt Ryan in a bunch of commercials?
What he lacks in charisma he makes up for in teeth.
Which team has that defender with the beautiful flowing hair?
Trick question! They BOTH have defenders with beautiful flowing hair. This is Clay Matthews, a linebacker for the Packers. This is Brooks Reed, a defensive end for the Falcons. They are not the same person. Do not be confused.
What should I yell if I want to support one of these teams?
If you’re gunning for Atlanta, say “Rise Up!”
If you’re gunning for Green Bay, it’s “Go Pack Go!”
It seems like there should be songs to go along with these teams. Ooh, are there songs?!